Rabbits Neglected Rabbit! What do I do?!

[doglaurasmudge]

I'd drop it off at her house, if you said to her she might dismiss it straight away. She also might find it embarrassing that you know better about rabbits than she does and you don't even have one? I know I would be!

As you have written in it that this is not meant to offend her then I say go for it.

 

[TacoBellWinnieP]

@doglaurasmudge I thought that too, but like another member said, I don't want it getting misinterpreted

 

[cavykaitlyn]

I think the overall letter is good, it includes helpful information rather than hurtful. But you want to leave out words like "neglect" because it fires up a lot of emotions when someone thinks they love an animal but are actually far from it. I know this because my sister's pig was neglected before she came to me. I told my sister what to do about it, and she got better at giving her water, but she still fed the wrong kind of food and when she ran out (I had two bags of food upstairs, the wrong kind but better than nothing) she basically just gave her less and less. Deli used to be a big pig, and now she's really much thinner. She never got Timothy hay past the first few weeks or so, and she's been here for over a year.

What I said about saying out loud what you want her to hear is important, because if you use any kind of words other than compliments she's likely to think you're insulting her. I have experience with situations like these within my own family. My sister's hamster died of starvation. I just want this bunny to be okay. I couldn't bear to hear of her death.

Take care,
~ck

 

[TacoBellWinnieP]

I feel like if I don't use the word neglect, she won't take me seriously. She's the kind of person that you really have to spell it out or she doesn't understand. Think of it as if she was a small child who knew nothing about rabbits, because that's basically the situation, except she's old enough to better than let him chew through wires or shut him outside with the cats. We got in to a BIG fight because of how immature she is and how mature I am for our age almost 2 years ago and are just got back in touch last summer though she lives down the street. She doesn't seem to understand that all these simple decisions she's making (putting him in the garage, leaving him outside all day, not treating him for mites properly) are extremely effecting his life for the worse

 

[cavykaitlyn]

Maybe you do have a point. I do think you want to help her start fresh instead of tearing her to pieces about her mistakes. If you accuse her of neglect (which is really what is happening, but she won't feel that way) you should be prepared to lose her. And judging by the fact that you've left her maturity level in the dust, I think you're ready to. But you really want to resolve the bunny issue BEFORE you blow up on her for being so stupid and immature. Make sure the bunny is safe first, because if you try to help the bunny and she's angry at you, she'll do something worse to the bunny because she can't hurt you, or she'll just close her doors and continue the neglect. You have to secure the target before you destroy the captor.

I'm pretty sure that I'm close to the same age as you, because you're not saying your age (I think those under 18 aren't allowed to) and you talk about your parents letting you do things and your friends' parents not knowing about the neglect.

Really try and either adopt the bunny yourself (I'm sure your parents will understand the sitch) or get her to another good home. I really don't think this girl is the right kind of person to be in charge of another's life.

 

[TacoBellWinnieP]

Maybe you do have a point. I do think you want to help her start fresh instead of tearing her to pieces about her mistakes. If you accuse her of neglect (which is really what is happening, but she won't feel that way) you should be prepared to lose her. And judging by the fact that you've left her maturity level in the dust, I think you're ready to. But you really want to resolve the bunny issue BEFORE you blow up on her for being so stupid and immature. Make sure the bunny is safe first, because if you try to help the bunny and she's angry at you, she'll do something worse to the bunny because she can't hurt you, or she'll just close her doors and continue the neglect. You have to secure the target before you destroy the captor.

I'm pretty sure that I'm close to the same age as you, because you're not saying your age (I think those under 18 aren't allowed to) and you talk about your parents letting you do things and your friends' parents not knowing about the neglect.

Really try and either adopt the bunny yourself (I'm sure your parents will understand the sitch) or get her to another good home. I really don't think this girl is the right kind of person to be in charge of another's life.

Well, I don't know that i,d go as far as saying I'm ready to leave her because I've literally know her since the day she was born! I really like the point you make about helping her rabbit first, all feelings aside, then have the serious heart breaking talk, if necessary. And I know my parents would understand because yesterday when I got home from her house I told my mom about what had happened and that i offered to take him and she didn't object or anything she just sat and listened.. Then she told me to let it go and just not be involved but we both know I can't do that lol. She also suggested I take all the extra grids I have down to her house and build oreo a cage (she doesn't know I'm saving them for a bunny, whether that ends up being Oreo or one from a shelter. I plan on talking to them about bunny after this gets resolved just in case I end up taking in Oreo, that way I don't end up with 2 unplanned.), so she's obviously aware of the problem and okay with me helping?

 

[cavykaitlyn]

That's an awfully long time to know someone! I just know you're really not okay with how she treats her bunny and that you find she's awfully immature, which is why I said you'd be ready to leave her.
So I take it everything is going better now? Are you making any progress at all? I think it's excellent you want a bunny, I really do, but don't turn away this one because you wanted to have your own.

I wanted to get a second piggy really bad. I wanted an Aby. But a few months later and suddenly my sister was offering up hers because she was "annoying" and "threw poop" when she was mad, which she doesn't do with me and Char at all. So no dream pair, but I still got a lovely piggy worthy of my love, labor, and time.

I think Oreo needs you to speak up for her. If you can, you really should adopt her! You said your parents understand, just play up the situation a little more. I'm not saying outright lie, but highlight the negatives of her life and emphasize that you'll be able to turn all that around.

Sorry if I missed anything, I can't see everyone's replies when I reply back so I have to work from memory.

 

[TacoBellWinnieP]

Thanks ! I meant, though, that I wouldn't get a shelter bunny until I helped oreo, or ask for one for that matter, in case I .ended up with him unplanned and then I'd have 2 bunnies. But yeah, thanks for all your help.I'm calling her tonight but I know she's been busy today so I might have to do this thing tomorrow? I still haven't decided how I want to give her this information. All the subjects in the letter were specifically things she's doing wrong, and I'm sure I've left somethings out, I don't know.

 

[TacoBellWinnieP]

@cavykaitlyn

 

[cavykaitlyn]

That's good that you want to help the animal you've got first. Taco, I think this was the bunny you were destined for. She needs you desperately. You can meet all the demands, can you not? Just a bit of smooth talking and you're home free.

I apologize for getting back to you so late. I post from my kindle, and having watched Netflix on it it needed to be charged. I don't get tag, pm, or quote notifications, just a banner that says how many topics I haven't read (I use Tapatalk). So I really can't tell who's talking to me, unfortunately.

I hope it's smooth sailing for Oreo. I'm rooting for you both.

 

[TacoBellWinnieP]

@cavykaitlyn Thanks for your encouragement! I do have everything that bunny needs including LOVE which he doesn't get now :/ He's such a sweetheart and I feel so bad knowing I can't just take him now! I really feel like she'll dig her heels in and disagree, but as soon as she sees how happy he is at my house, she'll be okay. I'm just worried about her parents being like "Noah, why are you taking the bunny you can't!" and just mess everything up! I guess I'm just thinking about all the things that could go wrong! Lol hopefully everything goes smoothly tomorrow! I'll have updates (and hopefully a rabbit XD) tomorrow!

 

[TacoBellWinnieP]

*Woah not Noah..

 

[oldnewie]

I'm not experienced in handling matters like this with family & friends, just with strangers when I've not been concerned with their feelings. @cavykaitlyn has been there & I think I'd run with her advice. You're prepared to go for it now, & I have no doubt your Mum is proud iof you for standing up for what she also knows is right. The rabbit will be welcomed into your home. Try not to worry about the parents. What could they actually do? They are just as in the wrong as your friend is. They may well agree for you to have him, less of a nuisance for them, right? Especially if it'll get you off their daughter's back, yeah?
The rabbit has top priority right now. Your friend will get over it once the rabbit is with you & she finds her commonsense.
All the best, girl, kia kaha (be strong), be encouraged.

 

[lunarminx]

When I write things down that I want to say, especially in a letter format, it makes me feel better and get a good perspective when I look back at it later. I wrote this this morning to her, and I think I'm either going to type it and give it to her or read it to her so it doesn't get misinterpreted like @cavykaitlyn said:


Dear [insert name],

I am writing this letter because I love and care about you, but I am also concerned about the wellbeing of your rabbit, Oreo. I thought I could give you some information that could enhance your fur-baby's life!

1) Food:
a)Rabbits need dry, plain pellets. This means rabbit food without fancy, colorful pieces like nuts, dried fruits, flakes, etc. They are mostly sugar, and would be the equivalent of putting M&M's in your salad everyday... Not healthy.
b)Rabbits need a minimum of 2 cups of chopped vegetables per every 6 lbs of body weight daily.
c)Timothy hay or other grass hats are essential to unhealthy rabbit's diet, and must always be available.
d)Fresh water must always be available!
*Anything more is considered a "treat" and must be given in strict moderation*

2) Handling:
a)When lifting your rabbit, support the butt and grasp the chest. Never lift a rabbit by the scruff of its neck! Their backs and necks are very fragile and if, when you are doing so, they kick out, they can easily break their backs/necks, resulting in paralysis or even death.
b)When holding your rabbit, support the butt with one hand, and the body with the other.

3) Housing:
a)Pet store cages are glorified litter boxes. The minimum cage height for a rabbit is one where he can completely stand on his hind legs, neither having to crouch nor hitting his ears on the top. The minimum required width is one in which he can jump 3 full lengths across the cage. A C&C cage is a good alternative to a hutch or regular cage because they Are easily customizable, and can fit into any space you have for it! These minimums were made assuming the rabbit has many hours of free range a day.
b) Rabbits should be kept in cool, dry places with a constant temperature. Keeping Oreo in the garage, a place with fluxes of hot and cold, forcibly exposed to the exhaust and fumes from your cars, and pitch black darkness, is inhumane and considered neglect.

4) Grooming:
a)Rabbits need to be brushed at least weekly. Like cats, they lick themselves clean, and if not brushed regularly, ingest large amounts of hair, resulting in blockages that lead to starvation.

This was written with the intent to help better the treatment of your pet, and in no way intended to hurt or offend you in any way.






So what do you think?
should I just give it to her to read, present it to her orally, or drop it off at her house and give her space to think? Thanks!

If you are printing this out, correct a mistake under food.
You put hay/grasss are essential for an unhealthy diet.
Other than that you are good.

 

[indycolts18]

c)Timothy hay or other grass hats are essential to unhealthy rabbit's diet, and must always be available.

under food......you put the word hats.... did you mean "........that are essential to a healthy rabbit diet, and must always be available."

 

[kendalm7]

I feel like she's just going to say oh well he's fine! When u describe how rabbits really need to be taken care of the right way because she seems to say oh well he's fine about his cage size and being outside, you could try this letter but don't expect it to change her because she probly won't care and ignore it and go back to the way she normally takes care of him! Poor baby rabbit also if you deside to give it to her I would say a letter is best so she can read it and keep it to remember exactly the way it should be if she desides to take your addvice good luck!

 

[TacoBellWinnieP]

@lunarminx Yeah, I meant healthy, but on my tablet I guess I typed "ahealthy" instead of "a healthy" and it changed to "unhealthy".

@indycolts18 Yeah I meant hays, autocorrect is stupid!

@kendalm7 I thought that too. I think i'm gonna say it to her and then give her the paper for reference

 

[Rabbit_Lover]

Rabbits, unlike guinea pigs do not need veggies everyday. Once every 3 or 4 days would be fine. Do you know the age of the rabbit? If it's under 6 months it shouldn't be fed any veggies at all. Everything else looks good.

 

[TacoBellWinnieP]

He's full grown and an adult, but she got him from a pet store so I'm not sure exactly. Also I read on line that they do? But I don't know. I think it was House Rabbit Society, but I could be wrong. I've read it many places that they do though? @Rabbit_Lover

 

[TacoBellWinnieP]

@oldnewie her parents are just as stubborn and like power plays so they might be like "No, we payed for it, its staying here!" I hope not. That's another reason to give her the paper so she can show her parents exactly what she's doing wrong. The paper is compiled of subjects that are what I saw that was wrong. There isn't anything on that paper of what she did right, which shows how much bad stuff she's doing.