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Problems between boyfriend and piggies.

KristenMatejka

Well-known Member
Cavy Slave
Joined
Oct 26, 2011
Messages
406
Sooo, I've got a huge problem. My boyfriend, up until recently was crazy for our pigs. He would cuddle them and feed them nummies and was always coming to their cage and talking to them. Now, he says he is fine with the pigs because he knows how much I love them but says he is not interested in them and no longer cares for them. That wouldn't really bother me but now whenever ones starts squeaking during the night he will yell at them and if he has to catch one he does it extremely roughly and it has gotten to the point where we are fighting continuously and I'm about to leave him because of it. I don't want to leave him because I do love him but I will if he continues to treat my pigs this way. He knows my pigs are my life and I would do anything for them!

Please help! We currently have eleven and he knows NONE of them will go! It's not an option, he wil go first! Any advice on how to handle this?

I also am starting a rescue and even though he says he is fine with it I'm hesitant now....he might be stressed because he started a new company recently but that's not an excuse.
 
Not being particularly fond of them is one thing but to handle them roughly is something completely different.
If he is rough with them, he is a danger to them.
Not saying to dump your boyfriend, but I would be concern if someone I cared about deeply mistreated something as small and defenseless as a guinea pig.
Do whatever you have to do to keep the pigs safe. They don't have anyone else in this situation to look out for their best interest.
 
And what happens if he treats one of your kids that way sometime in the future?

Rough handling of a small, helpless animal would be a huge red flag for me in any relationship. Do you really want to spend any more time with someone who would treat a 2 pound animal that way?
 
I know....I have talked to him about it. I said the next time he does something I am leaving him.
 
I would not wait until he hurts an innocent small, highly social & just as feeling animal again, you are responsible for their safety & they are not safe around him.
This is animal abuse, which is also a strong indicator of one's empathic ability towards any creature or individual. A danger that could also involve you now, or in the future.

He might be jealous of them, causing him to want them out or in pain. Do what yo need to do to keep them safe. If you don't end the relationship, please get therapy together & urge him to get help separately. This is not normal.

“If you want to know what a man's like, take a good look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals.” - Jo Rowling.
 
We have had our problems and we have gotten through alot. But for some reason I kept wanting to make excuses for him. But once he brought my pigs into the equation I couldn't think of one excuse. I have not let him touch one in quite a while and he seems content with them.

I want to thank you all for your advice and opinions. It has been hard dealing with it by myself. He has quite a temper but before it never was towards the pigs. But we actually do have therapy later today and I am going to bring that up.
 
next time might be the last time....
Harsh but look at your piggies permanant smiley faces, you cant get much cuter or more trusting,
what evil does a person have to treat a piggy nastily, i don't trust any one who would hurt an animal,

Must be very difficult for you that your boyfriend is being like it, i hope your ok x
 
I have done so much for my pigs and I am always changing the cages around to make sure they never get too bored and I'm always looking for more ways to get them/make more toys for them. I'm always making sure they have enough hay/pellets/veggies/water and love. It is hard dealing with my boyfriend acting like this but since I have told him I will leave him if he does it one more time he hasn't done it but i'm still not sure. And just thinking that has already cause me to pack some of my stuff.
I do love him so much but my pigs have always and will always come first in my life.
It may sound stupid or no but my boyfriend had a friend and his girlfriend over and the girlfriend was handling my pigs roughly and after asking her to stop and she didn't I ended up getting in a fight with her and literally tossing her out of the house and they haven't been back since. So needless to say I will do anything to keep them safe. They deserve nothing but the best and my neverending love and I do my absolute best to provide that for them.
I would never let one of them be in danger so if it comes to it i will do what is best for them. Even if it hurts me.
 
My foster, Peanut. I call him my cry baby because he will cry at me to cuddle with him and since he is alone during quarantine he spends most of his time right there. :)

This is just one of the many reasons I love them so much.
 

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I have a best friend who has a badly behaved spoilt 2yr old, my piggies were in the run (i have 8) and he got in it and went to pick one up so i picked him up and moved him away saying "No" (a word he rarely hears)
and he had a right tantrum throwing himself on the floor and hes mum going "oh shes a nasty not letting you play with the piggies" so i said "well if you won't sort him out i will he ain't hurting my piggie's" "its not like you can afford a vet bill" (which was pretty cruel of me given she had to get rid of her rabbit because she couldn't afford the vet bill for him)

The thing is we both know that we are the only ones to stick up for our pigs so we are vehement when protecting them, even if we love the person also we know they can for the most part look after themselves.
 
It might sound like it was rather rash of me to fight the girl but when she was being cruel to my pigs and then ended up pushing me I think I went nuts for a few. But now that it is my boyfriend I can't react the same way. Mainly because he is so much larger than me and male. But I told him if it happens again no more chances. I'm done. I can't put my pigs through it.

It's good to know I'm not the only that has been in that kind of situation
 
There's no telling some people! I don't blame you for reacting the way you did, I just worry abit as you say he's larger than you make's it sound like your scared of him? I think thought's like that shouldn't come into a truley fair and loving relationship. You have valid concern's and i would get out asap!
 
I echo what others have said. I also applaud you for your strength and compassion for your little charges.
 
i no how you feel my ex was like that, he wanted them so i paid for them and got us 3 after a month he lost interest and never fed them or picked them up....now am not with him and i am so much happier, you should tell him if you dont like them or want nothin to do with them then dont. tell him not to pick them up if he is being harsh about it i hope everythin will be okay for you <3
 
As most people are aware, things are easier said than done. After later this evening I'll know for sure what I'm going to do. For now the pigs are safe and if I feel they are in danger I will do whatever it takes to get them into a safe environment again. I am just going to see if i can even make things better. If I can I will try but he has no more chances. If there's nothing I can do I will leave.
 
Again, I appreciate all of the support. I really do. So much. No one else really understands why I would be willing to leave him over animals (as they say) but as I see it. If he is willing to treat them like that then he is willing to treat me even worse. I can't put up with it, and I only recently have stood up for myself. have always made sure my pigs are safe but i never really watched out for myself until recently. Because just recently he has started to talk to me about it.
 
If someone thinks you are wrong for putting your critters before your boyfriend they are selfish and unfeeling.
 
That is the way I see it. They depend fully on me to provide for them. I have never once asked anyone to get my pigs anything because I provide everything for them. I do everything. All my pigs want is to be safe and to be loved. And if I can't provide that while with my boyfriend I will leave him.
It will be hard but if it comes to that it will happen because my pigs are my life. They're the reason I strive to be successful. I don't think it is pathetic they are such a huge part in my life. I love my pigs and always will. I know some people may judge me because I am still with him but if I even think they will be in harms way i am gone. I just have so much stress right now....it's hard to think
 
That is the way I see it. They depend fully on me to provide for them. I have never once asked anyone to get my pigs anything because I provide everything for them. I do everything. All my pigs want is to be safe and to be loved. And if I can't provide that while with my boyfriend I will leave him.

Good job for sticking up for you and your pigs. You go girl! I hope he treats you and your pigs better after a little bit of therapy. I know you will keep your pigs safe and will do what is best for them. I think if someone else judges you for protecting an animal(s), they are just heartless. Good Luck!
 
I agree with the others- I think it is a HUGE red flag for him to treat an animal that way. You've seen a side of his personality that he may be good at hiding most of the time. Does he even feel any remorse over the way he was treating your animals? I think if I were you, I'd run in the opposite direction before he had a chance to do anything else. It only takes a few seconds of unchecked anger to really hurt someone or something...
 
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