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Getting Along Concerns about attitude to Naive newcomers

Jennicat

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Asking question is allowed. However, she started using foul language, according to her infractions. I assume they caged her when she did so so she would stop cursing on the boards.
 

Getting.cavys

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Can you really blame her? She asked a simple question out of curiousity and got it shoved back in her face by the mods.
 

Jennicat

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Yes, I do blame her for being unable to control her language.
 

Getting.cavys

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What would you do in her situation. Sit there and take it all?
 

VoodooJoint

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I have just read Katies thread and am appaild by what the Mods are saying! Its rude and wrong.
I'm apparently the mod who is believed to start the "rudeness" off. Let me be clear. She has been a member for a month. Plenty of time to have looked over the site and learn a little something. I, and others, get tired of repeating ourselves when the info is all over the site. If she had been brand new my tone may have been gentler but the message would have been the same. It's not like this is a general GP site. This site has a very specific topic line and it's hard to imagine that anyone would completely miss the aim of this forum and ask about housing outdoors.
She has been caged for her thread do you think it was fair?
It was 110% fair. She was not caged for "her thread", she was caged for breaking rules. She swore, she flounced and she posted after her flounce, These are all against the rules (that everyone should read before posting on any forum). She has no one to blame but herself for not bothering to learn the rules.
She only asked a question though. Is that not aloud, the mods only had to say yes or no. Not give her a hard time about it.
Please refer to my answer to the first quote in this post.

I replied

You have been around long enough to know that we do not condone outdoor housing here. I need to ask if you even bothered to read the title of this forum and the homepage?

This link may help you https://www.guineapigcages.com/location.htm

All true. She has been here long enough to have read the homepage and cage pages but apparently hasn't bothered. She even used the "alternative cages" section to try to back herself up. She obviously hadn't bothered to even LOOK at that section though or she would have realized what it was about. She got severely bent out of shape over my reply that really wasn't that harsh. I only pointed out the obvious.

Oh and shes not aloud to post but can read posts and PM.
Not true. She is allowed to post but must wait for a mod to come along and approve her posts. I have approved her posts on this thread and did so as soon as I logged on and read them over. If someone is going to break the rules enough to get themselves moderated then they will simply have to suffer the inconvenience of waiting to have their posts approved.

In short I, and others, are sick to death of repeating ourselves especially when it comes to the obvious. For pity's sake people, READ the homepages of a forum and READ the stickies. Most of the info is there. If you have follow-up questions they are welcomed but it starts to shred on my last thread of patience when a person can't be bothered to do a little reading themselves and, instead, bothers the members of the forum to explain it all to them AGAIN.
 

Jennicat

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If I had a problem with the mods, I would explain my problem. I wouldn't curse, certainly, and especially not on a messageboard that I knew had underage members on. I've had disagreements with folks on the board. It's not hard to remain civil.

In fact, see how myself and many members on this very thread disagree? I haven't called any of you names, or cursed at you, though I've had my attitude called poor. I certainly didn't mail back Katie with a PM full of curses when she insulted me. :melodrama
 

katie84

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And just for your info, Katie is still here, she sent me a lovely PM telling me I was a fool. :p

I am merely fighting my corner, because yet again, I get slated on the main board, and yet again, no one has bothered to act in any way possible.
I never PM'd you calling you just a fool, you have to give the whole story so one doesn't get the wrong impression, I was pointing out how you had been contradicting yourself, and I would hate for you to look foolish.

I understand my posts are monitored and I understand that one word was censored and it was not inappropriate language, you have to understand from coming from different countries we interpret things in a different way. This was discussed. So there is no problem there.
 

Getting.cavys

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Yes I suppose. I now she should definalty not of sworn but she just seemed to be very frustrated. I feel there was no need for her to be swooped down on because she asked if a shed was ok, she did not say she would put them there.
I know people on her that have there guinea pigs outside remember our chat in the chatroom, Jennicat. But she did not get jumped on plus she was an old member?
I understand it must get annoying repeating yourselfs mods, but maybe she did not understand? Im not sure.
 

katie84

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In fact, see how myself and many members on this very thread disagree? I haven't called any of you names, or cursed at you, though I've had my attitude called poor. I certainly didn't mail back Katie with a PM full of curses when she insulted me. :melodrama

You don't have to curse...but being patronising is worse enough. Isn't it ''darling''...isn't that what you were calling me??

You say your PM was 'full' of curses??? Sorry but that must have been off someone else?
 

VoodooJoint

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You don't have to curse...but being patronising is worse enough. Isn't it ''darling''...isn't that what you were calling me??
Personal issues are best suited for PMs as long as it doesn't become harassing. Take it off the boards and into pms or into a private chat room.
 

katie84

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Personal issues are best suited for PMs as long as it doesn't become harassing. Take it off the boards and into pms or into a private chat room.


I never brought it onto the board it was Jenni I believe. I am merely giving my side of the story. Why should she be allowed to say lies about me and yet I get pulled up for replying? Like that isn't favoritism is it.
 

Jennicat

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Sorry VJ, didn't mean to drag it onto the board, it was just a handy example. :)
 

VoodooJoint

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I never brought it onto the board it was Jenni I believe. I am merely giving my side of the story. Why should she be allowed to say lies about me and yet I get pulled up for replying? Like that isn't favoritism is it.

Jenn was talking about you, not to you. Her quotes below are answering questions about your status and activity before your posts were approved. She couldn't have been talking directly to you since she didn't even know you were posting.

And just for your info, Katie is still here, she sent me a lovely PM telling me I was a fool. :p

Asking question is allowed. However, she started using foul language, according to her infractions. I assume they caged her when she did so so she would stop cursing on the boards.

Yes, I do blame her for being unable to control her language.
 

Getting.cavys

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Yes, they were to me I was standing by Katie.
 

katie84

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I am sorry but if she is posting about me on the Main Board of course I am going to see it... and the way she did it is very childish, that is why I said she was contradicting herself in her other posts.

No matter what I say or how I say it, your always going to be stubborn and unkind to me. Which is bullying and is unfair.

I have not used unappropriate language to the extent you are making it out to be. I said one word which involved a donkey, but yet that is for you to argue over yourselves. But the whole exaggeration and lies, and stories of PM's full of curses is what I find foolish.
 

Susan9608

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We've had numerous, numerous threads and posts, discussing how "mean" the tone is here and how we ought to be "helping" the new people instead of driving them away. This thread certainly isn't the first of its kind,and I doubt it will be the last.

While many of our members consider themselves friends and talk about things other than guinea pigs and guinea pig cages, the fact is that this is a factual forum with a stated purpose. That being said, it is extremely disrespectful to ALL the members of the forum for a newcomer to bypass all the information on the homepage, all the stickies, and all of the rules, philosophies, and policies section, and immediately go posting away questions that could have be answered by the aforementioned information.

No one expects newcomers to wade through ALL the threads, posts, and information on the forum. It is not unreasonable, however, to expect that newcomers do *some* reading before posting, and therefore, it is not unreasonable to expect someone who has been a member for a month to know that, by our philosophies here, outdoor housing is not an appropriate choice.

Some people can't stand being corrected. Some people are so sensitive in nature that bluntness and/or firmness is interpreted by them as "meanness" and "rudeness." This tendency to interpret things in the worst light possible is, unfortunately, not my problem nor is it the problem of the other moderators.

Our job is not to go around and coddle everyone's feelings and tell them that everything they say, do, and ask is just right and lovely. Our job is simply to enforce the rules, principles, policies, and philosophies of this forum.

If anyone has a problem with the way a moderator has handled a particular situation, the mature and correct way of dealing with that situation would be to a) private message the moderator involved, b) private message any of the other moderators (there are certainly enough to choose from), and/or c) take the problem to CavySpirit herself. The INCORRECT and IMMATURE way to handle a problem is to bring it out into a public thread on the forum.

If anyone finds the tone here disagreeable and/or dislikes the way situations are handled, well, no one is forcing you to stay. There are a great many forums out there, many of which do cater to people's feelings and make sure everything is all happiness and light all the time. You're most welcome to go join one of those forums instead.

In the end, threads like this accomplish nothing, except for getting people all worked up about perceived slights, rather than getting worked up over taking proper care of their pets.
 

Percy's Mom

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I am definately taking this matter further. This is certainly out of line!
Who are you planning to take this matter further to? This is a private forum that allows anyone over the age of 13 to join without a fee. Being private, there are forum rules and philosophies that should be read before a new member reads before starting to post. If someone decides not to bother reading these things or chooses to ignore them, I find it incredible that they are shocked and upset when a response isn't to their liking.

If you're a newbie who hasn't yet read the rules and philosophies of the forum, or even if you're a longer time member who wants a refresher, please go to this Newbie thread.
 

VoodooJoint

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Yes, they were to me I was standing by Katie.
Exactly what I said. She was speaking to you. Answering questions you had about Katie. She was not arguing with Katie about a personal issue. There is a difference.
stories of PM's full of curses is what I find foolish.
I failed to see where someone said you were sending PMs full of curses. Please show me where that was said because I don't believe anyone accused you of that. If it is true I need the PMs forwarded to me so I can infract you for the abuse of the PM system.
 

FoolOnTheHill

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Surely the number of people who find themselves jumped on or replied to 'meanly' shows that sometimes around here people are a bit less than friendly.
I'm not saying everyone should be told everything they do is right and lovely, but maybe just changing your words slightly would make the forum seem more welcoming to newbies who have come to learn, and maybe accidentally bypassed rules, notes, stickies etc.

Already Katie has stated that she will not be returning, and many members have done this in the past so I think this shows that while the posts are not meant meanly or rudely they can easily seem so to newer members. These members aren't going to learn anything now - this website doesn't focus solely on cages - and they could have learn a lot about diet, rescues etc.
I don't know of any other websites which have such great info as here and this is where these members will go to (especially after being told they're welcome to leave!) - forums which may be more welcoming but may also support breeding, will not have information on why outdoor housing is inadvisable etc etc.

I think overall this forum is great but simply by wording posts slightly differently, less members will be offended/upset and stick around longer. I personally know that posts like VJ's original were not intended rudely, but I can easily see it may seem like that to a newer member who is not used to the forum.
 

Ly&Pigs

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There is an old adage that says, "You can't please all the people all the time". That is especially true for this forum.

There is a whole section dedicated to outdoor issues. It's called the "Outdoor Environments" forum. Although this particular forum section is dedicated to talking about outdoor runs and safe play areas, there are many threads in there on outdoor housing and why it's not acceptable.

It's so easy for people to read what they want into a post. Some find posts mean, rude, condescending, etc., when others find these same posts factual and to the point and not mean, rude, condescending, etc. I honestly think the people should take the time to walk away from a post they personally find mean or rude and mull it over a bit then come back and read it again, maybe even a few more times before they decide to respond to it. I do this quite frequently. Sometimes when you re-read it a few times, you realize that YOU yourself have put more into it than what is actually there.

If you read the post once and decide immediately that it's a mean, rude post and you are a bit hotheaded yourself after reading it, you are more likely to be the same you are accusing others of being when you post your reply. I've seen this time and time again. Then it just gets further heated because people are so hotheaded after they read the previous replies and the tone and the topic of the posts change.

Adding a bit on to what Susan said, my best advice is when you read a post and YOU think it's mean, rude, condescending, or out of line, you don't need to reply that it's any of the above but report the post. A copy of a reported post goes to all the moderators including CavySpirit. If you don't want to report the post because you think a particular mod has been out of line or whatever, then you can send your concerns to a different mod by private message or directly to cavyspirit.
 
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