I apologize if this is long and thank you in advance. I need somewhere to vent and maybe get some help understanding a few things.
Questions:
- Is it normal for eyes to be open when they pass? It seemed as if they closed a little as we held him.
- And the strangest to me was that he had some poop stuck to his butt as if he was in the process of pooping when he died? (it was like mushy wet poop [possibly diarrhea] not his regular poops) He didn’t have diarrhea when he was alive or anywhere in his cage. Can anyone please tell me if that’s normal or what could have caused that.
- Also I’m just worried that he wasn’t actually dead but in some paralysis/shock state and just couldn’t move? Is that possible? All I’m really sure of is that he wasn’t moving at all and for the next few hours he remained the same... motionless. At times it seemed like I felt his tummy move like breathing but when I asked somebody else to feel they said they couldn’t feel anything so I thought maybe it was just all in my head. Something just keeps telling me he wasn’t dead or at least not completely and maybe I could have done something...
A little backstory: My sister got Ginney for my nephew for Christmas (Dec. 2018) He named him “Ginney”. He initially was for my nephew but we all took care of him and loved him like he was all of ours. He was 3 months when we got him.
Dec. 11 2021: We lost our Ginney (he was 3 yrs)
It was a regular Saturday & Ginney wasn’t acting any different. He didn’t give us a reason to suspect that it might be his last day... We decided to go get groceries some time around 3 something. When we left he was drinking water and eating hay. We came back around late 4ish and my husband went to go check on Ginney. He called me over and told me that he didn’t look too good because he was just laying there on his side (there were times where he would do that and give us a scare but he would just be sleeping, this time it felt different). I called his name but he didn’t move. I gently shook the cage a little bit and nothing... that’s when we knew he was gone. When we picked him up he wasn’t cold nor stiff but he was limp, maybe it wasn’t long that he had passed? We wrapped him up and I tried to keep him warm in hopes that maybe he would wake up and start moving. I wanted to try CPR or something but my husband told me what if I make it worse so I didn’t. We checked for a heartbeat as best as we could because honestly we weren’t sure exactly where and we didn’t feel anything. I also checked his tummy but I didn’t see nor feel it moving.
His eating habit was off for days prior to this and was losing some weight... some days he would eat okay, other days he would eat just a few bites and wouldn’t want anymore. I thought maybe he just wasn’t in the mood for whatever I was giving him or just wasn’t hungry in that moment. He would drink water okay.
I cried and cried. I felt and still feel so guilty. What if I just didn’t go to the grocery store that day and stayed home with him instead. He would probably still be here. I should have spent more time with him, played with him more. I should have paid more attention to him. I should have taken him to the vet as soon as I noticed something was off. I wish that I could go back in time and fix everything. At least tried to do cpr or something because now it will always be in the back of my mind like What If... most of all I’m so sorry that I wasn’t there and he was alone... I know I could have done better for him and I really regret that. I definitely have learned some lessons from this situation but I did love him very much.
Questions:
- Is it normal for eyes to be open when they pass? It seemed as if they closed a little as we held him.
- And the strangest to me was that he had some poop stuck to his butt as if he was in the process of pooping when he died? (it was like mushy wet poop [possibly diarrhea] not his regular poops) He didn’t have diarrhea when he was alive or anywhere in his cage. Can anyone please tell me if that’s normal or what could have caused that.
- Also I’m just worried that he wasn’t actually dead but in some paralysis/shock state and just couldn’t move? Is that possible? All I’m really sure of is that he wasn’t moving at all and for the next few hours he remained the same... motionless. At times it seemed like I felt his tummy move like breathing but when I asked somebody else to feel they said they couldn’t feel anything so I thought maybe it was just all in my head. Something just keeps telling me he wasn’t dead or at least not completely and maybe I could have done something...
A little backstory: My sister got Ginney for my nephew for Christmas (Dec. 2018) He named him “Ginney”. He initially was for my nephew but we all took care of him and loved him like he was all of ours. He was 3 months when we got him.
Dec. 11 2021: We lost our Ginney (he was 3 yrs)
It was a regular Saturday & Ginney wasn’t acting any different. He didn’t give us a reason to suspect that it might be his last day... We decided to go get groceries some time around 3 something. When we left he was drinking water and eating hay. We came back around late 4ish and my husband went to go check on Ginney. He called me over and told me that he didn’t look too good because he was just laying there on his side (there were times where he would do that and give us a scare but he would just be sleeping, this time it felt different). I called his name but he didn’t move. I gently shook the cage a little bit and nothing... that’s when we knew he was gone. When we picked him up he wasn’t cold nor stiff but he was limp, maybe it wasn’t long that he had passed? We wrapped him up and I tried to keep him warm in hopes that maybe he would wake up and start moving. I wanted to try CPR or something but my husband told me what if I make it worse so I didn’t. We checked for a heartbeat as best as we could because honestly we weren’t sure exactly where and we didn’t feel anything. I also checked his tummy but I didn’t see nor feel it moving.
His eating habit was off for days prior to this and was losing some weight... some days he would eat okay, other days he would eat just a few bites and wouldn’t want anymore. I thought maybe he just wasn’t in the mood for whatever I was giving him or just wasn’t hungry in that moment. He would drink water okay.
I cried and cried. I felt and still feel so guilty. What if I just didn’t go to the grocery store that day and stayed home with him instead. He would probably still be here. I should have spent more time with him, played with him more. I should have paid more attention to him. I should have taken him to the vet as soon as I noticed something was off. I wish that I could go back in time and fix everything. At least tried to do cpr or something because now it will always be in the back of my mind like What If... most of all I’m so sorry that I wasn’t there and he was alone... I know I could have done better for him and I really regret that. I definitely have learned some lessons from this situation but I did love him very much.
I Love You and Miss You So Much Ginney