Rehoming Im feeling a tinsy bit paranoid.

trenbeau · Aug 25, 2013

So I *FINALLY* got a nibble on Malcolm. Someone texted and said that they were interested, yay! I asked if they had a c&c and another male guinea pig, they said "yes and yes! I have everything" So hurray! We made a date for me to drop him off, today at 7. Just a couple minutes ago they text me saying that theyve had some delays, which is no problem because I was running behind as well. But they want me to drop the guinea pig off with their very trustworthy friends. Now, I am SUPER uncomfortable with that, because I want to drop Mal off and make sure that this person wasnt lying about having a c&c and a friend for Mal. So I told him that I would rather just wait. Am I being too paranoid?? What would you guys do in this situation?

Another thing is, I really need to find Mal a home

. My boyfriend is getting really upset with me over us having him, and it is really stressing our relationship out. Yesterday, I was a little upset about Mal leaving (he's been here for three weeks, and I have grown very attached) and I was a little on edge. My boyfriend said that he didnt understand why I was being edgy and when I said that it was because Mal was leaving he thought that I wias just being upset to try and make him say we could keep him. It's developing into such an issue that I dont even feel like Im doing a good thing by taking him in and trying to find him the best home possible. Fighting about it constantly just drains all the joy out of it, you know?

Has anyone else ever had issues with a spouse/boyfriend over their pigs? how was it handled?

trenbeau · Aug 25, 2013

Also if anyone could possibly take a guinea pig in Saskatchewan, Mal really, really urgently needs a good loving home. He's such a sweetie and I just feel like I am stuck between a rock and a hard place. Either my boyfriend and I are fighting and Mal stays here or I let him go to a home that I dont approve of.

Aleks · Aug 25, 2013

I think you did the right thing. If I were in that situation I would definitely want to make sure that they have a proper cage and a buddy for him.
In my opinion you can never be too careful when it comes to making sure an adopter meets your criteria.

ETA: I don't have much advice to give as far as the arguing goes, but I wish you well.
The only piggy related things my boyfriend and I have argued about is their hay and the amount of money I put in the vet fund each week.

Skinny Wilbur · Aug 25, 2013

I don't think you are being paranoid AT ALL. Those people might not have even had a cage or another piggy - might just want for food for a reptile. I don't trust people that do not allow you to come to their house when THEY are the ones that are adopting or (rehoming) & the living conditions need to be verified.

As far as the boyfriend goes - it's not worth arguing over. You are fostering a pet that needs you to help find a forever home - no argument necessary. I will not go on with my opinion because we all have to live with our choices. My husband was not an animal person when we got together but he is now - a big pet lover! I told him when we 1st got together that I was an animal lover & NO ONE WOULD TAKE MY PETS FROM ME.

Good luck finding a home for your friend.

trenbeau · Aug 25, 2013

Now he/she's saying that theyll get the friends to "pick up it's cage for me to drop it off" OHMYGOD I HOPE IT'S A C&C. But how would he possibly go and pick up a c&c?! Why cant people just be informed and nice. Plus what does that mean for their other pig, if they have one? Do they even have one?

Aleks · Aug 25, 2013

trenbeau said:
Now he/she's saying that theyll get the friends to "pick up it's cage for me to drop it off" OHMYGOD I HOPE IT'S A C&C. But how would he possibly go and pick up a c&c?! Why cant people just be informed and nice. Plus what does that mean for their other pig, if they have one? Do they even have one?

I would talk to them and in some way nicely ask them what kind of cage they are getting/have and what the dimensions of it are.

littlenme · Aug 25, 2013

I would just be direct and tell them you will be happy to reschedule for a time that would be better for them to be there. And for you to see where mal will be living. I would let them know too many transitions will just be stressful for him, and that you also would feel more at ease being with him when he is moved to his new home. End of story they either are being honest and will agree, or have something to hide and will make a stink.

chas25 · Aug 25, 2013

I'm a bit animal enthusiast and I like to "collect" animals (I have 7 hermit crabs, 4 piggies, and a dog right now but we are in an apartment and don't have room for more right now). I've been super lucky to have a boyfriend that allows for that and the only time we have anything close to an argument is when he doesn't understand that what most people think is "ok" for pets (cage size, type of food) isn't always good for them. But really we rarely fight about anything. I'm not sure I could be with someone who wouldn't let me have pets. Surely he can wait until you can find a good home. Why is he so against you having a pig anyways? if you don't mind my asking I don't want to pry

trenbeau · Aug 25, 2013

Aleks said:
I would talk to them and in some way nicely ask them what kind of cage they are getting/have and what the dimensions of it are.

I just kinda manned up and told him/her (very nicely) that I would not be dropping Mal off at someone elses house. He says that his other pig has a separate cage "a nice cage" that I will be seeing when I drop Malcolm off when he gets home from where he is now. I just really hope that he's going to get taken care of. I wish more people could see the value of taking in an animal that needs a home. He's so loving. But I dont want to condemn these people yet, Im hoping that this was all just a big misunderstanding and he'll have a home that's better than mine, or at least as good.

aspecht · Aug 25, 2013

Just tell them that you HAVE to see their cage, in person, and make sure that your pig is going to get along with their pig. That is another issue you need to address, otherwise your pig may end up in a shelter for causing a fight with their pig. As for the husband/bf, well, I just took in two rescues and my husband had a cow at first. Then he realized that the pigs were being kept in terrible conditions and got over it. If he wouldn't have, then I would have had to reconsider my husband honestly. My husband cares about me, and knows that I love animals, so he loves them for me. It's a compromise we make. He knows that I am keeping these two boys, so he asked for a snake (I said no!) but agreed to let him get a lizard. COMPROMISE. Sit down with your bf, explain to him what can happen if you don't find a good, reliable home for the pig and that if he is patient, then it would make the process easier and quicker.

Again, I would tell those potential adopters either they meet you, in person and allow you to see their cage and other guinea pig, or find another home.

pinky · Aug 25, 2013

Too many red flags for me. I'd say to wait until you can meet the person face to face, see the C&C cage and the other guinea pig. I would definitely bring someone along with you. Are you giving him away for free? If you ask at least $5, it might keep him from being used as a feeder.... Why is your boyfriend getting so upset?

trenbeau · Aug 25, 2013

chas25 said:
I'm a bit animal enthusiast and I like to "collect" animals (I have 7 hermit crabs, 4 piggies, and a dog right now but we are in an apartment and don't have room for more right now). I've been super lucky to have a boyfriend that allows for that and the only time we have anything close to an argument is when he doesn't understand that what most people think is "ok" for pets (cage size, type of food) isn't always good for them. But really we rarely fight about anything. I'm not sure I could be with someone who wouldn't let me have pets. Surely he can wait until you can find a good home. Why is he so against you having a pig anyways? if you don't mind my asking I don't want to pry

He grew up without any animals at all, like ever. Whereas I grew up in a household that took in every stray cat that ended up on our doorstep (until we could find them a good home, but most of the time we ended up keeping them). My parents right now have 8 cats, and I have absolutely loved taking care of all sorts of animals growing up that I literally cannot fathom not having a connection with them but he just doesn't see the draw. I have told him before that Im never going to turn away an animal that needs help, and he has told me that we can't afford to save the world, which is true. I have already adopted two guinea pigs, that I am the sole care-giver for, he likes them well enough but he doesn't love them like I do. His major issue with Mal is that we didn't ask our landlord, because I thought he would only be here for a week or so (who knew that it would be so hard to find a good home?). My boyfriend feels like we are lying to him, but Mal shares the cage with my two boys, and is not affecting anything in our condo so I dont really see this being a huge problem. This is honestly the first time we've ever had this huge difference in our views.

trenbeau · Aug 25, 2013

You guys are totally right on the potential home BTW. I will be going and checking it out and seeing if Mal gets along with the other pig. I wasn't asking anything for him, but I did state in the ad that I need to be able to see that he will have a friend, a c&c cage and fresh veg and hay. I thought that it would be way too much trouble for someone wanting him for snake food to create a c&c etc.

trenbeau · Aug 25, 2013

Yeah, the guy just texted back and said that he thinks it's going to be better for him to go and get a guinea pig from petcetera. So, no to having a c&c.

trenbeau · Aug 25, 2013

That's a very good idea ThePigAlchemist. I will definitely be doing that next time instead. If there is a next time. Right now Im just trying to see if any of my friends could possibly make room for a very nice pig. That way I could still keep an eye on him.

aspecht · Aug 25, 2013

I would consider keeping him personally! If he gets along with your boys and is already housed with them lol. I found that going from two to four boys really wasn't that much more expensive. A little more for hay each month, but I already was buying enough vegetables to feed a herd so really, it all evens out here.

chas25 · Aug 25, 2013

aspecht said:
I would consider keeping him personally! If he gets along with your boys and is already housed with them lol. I found that going from two to four boys really wasn't that much more expensive. A little more for hay each month, but I already was buying enough vegetables to feed a herd so really, it all evens out here.

I don't think that would be an option for her boyfriend

aspecht · Aug 25, 2013

chas25 said:
I don't think that would be an option for her boyfriend

I already responded about the bf lol! Like I said, that's what I would do. With me, if he didn't understand what I'm passionate about then he wouldn't be around long,
and my husband understand that.

trenbeau · Aug 25, 2013

aspecht said:
I would consider keeping him personally! If he gets along with your boys and is already housed with them lol. I found that going from two to four boys really wasn't that much more expensive. A little more for hay each month, but I already was buying enough vegetables to feed a herd so really, it all evens out here.

I would LOVE to keep him aspecht! I have just fallen so in love with him, but my boyfriend says absolutely not because of our landlord not knowing. Plus we already acquired Frodo without our Landlord's permission (accidentally, we just forgot to ask and asked later), so I really believe that the landlord wouldnt be cool with it.

Plus my boyfriend is the one that deals with our landlord and is a little friendly with him, so he would need to be the one to ask and I know he wont. He has told me that "two is the limit" and I love him, so I feel a need to respect that. I had told him that I was okay with just having two (we were only supposed to have one, but then found out they were herd animals). So it is a no-win for now. Once we have our own place, I am free to have a pig room, but right now I can see where he is coming from.

aspecht · Aug 25, 2013

trenbeau said:
I would LOVE to keep him aspecht! I have just fallen so in love with him, but my boyfriend says absolutely not because of our landlord not knowing. Plus we already acquired Frodo without our Landlord's permission (accidentally, we just forgot to ask and asked later), so I really believe that the landlord wouldnt be cool with it.

Plus my boyfriend is the one that deals with our landlord and is a little friendly with him, so he would need to be the one to ask and I know he wont. He has told me that "two is the limit" and I love him, so I feel a need to respect that. I had told him that I was okay with just having two (we were only supposed to have one, but then found out they were herd animals). So it is a no-win for now. Once we have our own place, I am free to have a pig room, but right now I can see where he is coming from.

I can see where you're coming from for sure! Like I also said earlier though, I would definitely find someone who is willing to let you into their home for an "inspection" before you rehome it! Do you have a local rescue close? Sometimes they will help you rehome if you're willing to foster it (well, basically just continue to care for it until they can find it a home).

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Rehoming Im feeling a tinsy bit paranoid.

trenbeau

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