mmm veggies!

[futureguineamom]

Hello.. okay, I have been trying to go vegetarian for a few years now. The thing is, my parents won't let me. I've been trying since I was 12 or 13, and my parents would rather me sit at the table for hours until everything is gone (I'm now 18, 19 in march). I think meat is disgusting and I used to gag on it when I was just a toddler! My parents always tell me that I would sit in my highchair chewing on just ONE piece of meat for an hour before I'd finally swallow it.

Another conflict I have is that I'm such a picky eater.. I look at things of tofu and it looks so disgusting I don't think I could ever eat it, and there aren't very many vegetables I like. I enjoy fruit, pasta's, potatoes, etc.

A question I have though is what do you do when your invited to somebody's house for dinner? I mean, with my parents they aren't going to make a vegetarian meal if only one person is vegetarian. Do you know what I mean? What about if I go to my boyfriends family holiday get-togethers, and they've made mainly meat?

Also, do you take supplements? I admit, if I don't think about what I'm eating I enjoy chicken or turkey breasts, as long it is boneless and skinless - any sight of a vien or the feel of a knife touching bone makes me sick. Do you still get all of the nutrition you need without meat?

[futureguineamom]

P.S. One thing that I know I can't live without is dairy products. But at least with dairy most cows (that I know of ) are treated right and aren't being harmed. Right? Just so that you know I won't cut dairy out.. just MEAT.

[Slap Maxwell]

You are definetily of age to decide for yourself now. Tofu is acctually quite yummy. I am relitively picky myself, but I don't mind it at all- just cooked and not raw.

I eat over my neighbors all the time. They are aware of my choice and are happy to provide me with veg options. Usually this consits of a salad or potatoes, or pasta. There is usually always something veg that you can eat. If not, offer to make something. I make quich all the time for holidays. I usually make an asparagus one, a broccoli one, and spinach one. People enjoy them and it is good to get them to eat veggies!

I have been veg for about seven months now. I started to take supplements but didn't continue for very long. There are special vitamins made for veg people, but they are hard to locate. I have had problems with low blood sugar and gaining weight, but I don't know if they are related, they may have to do with the medications I take.

Unfortunetily what I hate about dairy products is that it supports the veal industry and is just plain not good for you. You can read http://www.peta.org/mc/factsheet_display.asp?ID=98 but personally giving up dairy is not an option for me either at the moment, however I limit the amount of milk I drink.

I also limit my eggs, stopped using a lot of down, wool, and leather. I have never used fur. I am concious about using products that are tested on animals.

[futureguineamom]

I also won't use leather or fur, but why not wool? Don't they basically just shave the animal? I was taken to a sheep farm with my school for about grade 4 or so, and we were taught how to shave them and how the wool was spun. (Mind you it was on a pioneer themed farm..)

I don't like using products that have been tested on animals, but they are hard to come by, you know?

I'm also all for composting and recycling, but my parents aren't because they only see it as a hassle.

I can't wait to move out!

[Slap Maxwell]

In New Zealand and Australia it is a lot different, especially the muelsing. You can read about it here: http://www.peta.org/mc/factsheet_display.asp?ID=55

In Australia, the most commonly raised sheep are Merinos, specifically bred to have wrinkly skin, which means more wool per animal. This unnatural overload of wool causes animals to die of heat exhaustion during hot months, and the wrinkles also collect urine and moisture. Attracted to the moisture, flies lay eggs in the folds of skin, and the hatched maggots can eat the sheep alive. To prevent “flystrike,” Australian ranchers perform a barbaric operation—mulesing—or carving huge strips of flesh off the backs of unanesthetized lambs’ legs and around their tails. This is done to cause smooth, scarred skin that won’t harbor fly eggs, yet the bloody wounds often get flystrike before they heal.

Within weeks of birth, lambs’ ears are hole-punched, their tails are chopped off, and the males are castrated without anesthetics. Male lambs are castrated when between 2 and 8 weeks old, with a rubber ring used to cut off blood supply—one of the most painful methods of castration possible.Every year, hundreds of lambs die before the age of 8 weeks from exposure or starvation, and mature sheep die every year from disease, lack of shelter, and neglect. Faced with so much death and disease, the rational solution would be to reduce the number of sheep so as to maintain them decently. Instead, sheep are bred to bear more lambs to offset the deaths.

I know non-animal tested products are hard to come by, which sucks. Just try to read the back bottom of your makeup, shampoo, and soap as well as other hygeine product's bottles.

[futureguineamom]

Wow, that is so awful! I've never heard of anything like it. They keep them really nice here as far as I can tell, and just use grooming tools to simply shear off the fur (NOT THE SKIN!)

[futureguineamom]

Okay.. now how can I get my parents to accept the fact that I want to be vegetarian?! They think you need meat to be healthy, and are very old fashioned and set in their ways. Like I said, they would STILL at the age of 18, rather make me sit at the table for hours until the meat is gone than let me not eat meat. Please help me get them to accept my personal eating preferences!

[Slap Maxwell]

You need to let them know you are an adult and can make your own decisions about what you eat. What are they worried about? Protein? Eat beans!

By contrast, eating too much animal protein has been directly linked to the formation of kidney stones and has been associated with cancer of the colon and liver. By replacing animal protein with vegetable protein, you can improve your health while enjoying a wide variety of delicious foods.

From: http://www.peta.org/mc/factsheet_display.asp?ID=105

There are many other reasons. Here are a couple from http://goveg.com/.

Because a vegan diet reverses heart disease.
On the American Heart Association (AHA) diet, which includes meat, patients’ arteries continue to clog, while Dr. Dean Ornish’s vegan diet unclogs arteries. In one study, AHA dieters experienced a 28 percent average worsening of clogged arteries, while dieters on Ornish’s program experienced an 8 percent improvement in their arteries.

Because eating meat and dairy products makes you fat.
As a nation, we’re getting fatter, and the Atkins diet has only made matters worse because it only works in the short term. Only 2 percent of pure vegetarians are obese, which is about one-ninth the figure for meat-eating Americans.

Because in every package of chicken, there’s a little poop.
A USDA study found that 98 percent of broiler chicken carcasses had detectable levels of E. coli, indicating fecal contamination.

Because you wouldn’t eat your dog.
Most people are horrified that some cultures eat dogs or whales, but these animals suffer no more than animals commonly consumed in the U.S. The difference is only cultural, not moral.

Because mad cow disease is in the U.S.
Any animal with a brain could contract a version of mad cow disease, yet millions of pigs and chickens are still being fed the remains of diseased animals—in violation of World Health Organization recommendations and the laws of Europe and Japan.

Because it takes a small person to beat a defenseless animal ... and an even smaller person to eat one.
If you’re eating meat, you are paying others to commit acts so cruel that if committed against dogs or cats, they would warrant felony cruelty charges in most U.S. states.

Because the grain used to feed animals could be used to feed hungry people.
A full 80 percent of U.S. agricultural land is used to raise chickens, pigs, and other farmed animals; 70 percent of grains produced are used to feed them. If the massive quantities of grain, soy, and corn now fed to factory-farmed animals were freed up, there would be plenty of food for the world’s starving people.

Because more than half of all water used in the U.S. is used to raise animals for food.
A totally vegetarian diet requires 300 gallons of water per day, while a meat-eating diet requires more than 4,000 gallons of water per day. Time magazine reports, “Around the world, as more water is diverted to raising [cattle], pigs, and chickens, instead of producing crops for direct consumption, millions of wells are going dry.”

Because when animals feel pain, they scream, too.
If you burn them, they feel it. If you give them electric shocks, they feel it. Other animals feel pain in the same way and to the same degree that we humans do.

Because it isn’t fair.
Killing other animals is an act of exploitation and violence, and we do it only because we have the power to.

You also might ask them to watch http://www.goveg.com/factoryFarming.asp

[futureguineamom]

Thanks... I dread even bringing the topic up.. I know its going to turn into a big fight..

[amyjane]

Eating over at other people's homes has always been a problem for me. Sometimes you just have to be flexible. Many a time I've had to literally pick meat out my food in order to have something to eat. I try to let people know in advance.

[futureguineamom]

Yeah, I like the idea of making a vegetarian dish to take over, and that way they don't have to make anything special. Well, my mom seemed to be supportive when I talked to her and told her in a polite manner that I am 18 now and I feel I should be able to make my own decisions for what I eat and what I don't eat.. until she served me left-over chicken for supper. It's not easy, is it? I feel like I have to wait until I can afford my own apartment. Yikes.

[Susan W]

I would have politely asked my mom why she was serving me leftover chicken after the nice talk we just had in which I thought she understood me. Polite talking about issues such as this really can solve a lot of problems.

Edited to add: You can always make your own dinner too, you don't need her to serve you anymore since you are an adult now! Then you can make yourself any-veggie-thing you want without conflict.

Usually when I go to people's houses, I just don't take any of the meat, and eat only the other stuff. When they try to get me to take some I politely say I don't eat meat. If people know, they often try to cook more vegetable things for me. I always feel bad that they go to the extra trouble and I always tell them not to go to the extra trouble, but nice people will do so anyway. (Because if there's nothing for me to eat, I can just eat more when I get home).

[futureguineamom]

My mom has a thing with everybody having something different for supper, because then it's not like we're all eating supper "together" or something like that. Meanwhile, her and my dad had something totally different. Even while she was making it for me, I said to her "So, I guess this vegetarian thing is going to have to happen gradually..?" And all she said is that is kind of difficult when you live with other people who aren't vegetarians, and that a lot of people frown on them.. etc.

Story of my life. I feel so.. disrespected, if that is even a word.

[Susan W]

Well, you are eating together if you're all sitting at the same table at the same time eating. It doesn't matter what's on your plate. It sounds to me (because your parents ate something different) like your mom may be against the idea of you being vegetarian, and is just trying to come up with excuses that make it hard for you. I live with my significant other, who used to cook for me (delicious meat dishes) and I had to give that up when I turned veggie. I miss that bonding experience, but, I'd still rather be veggie. So now we each cook our own dinners and eat them together at the table. It was difficult to get us there at first (because he didn't know why I was rejecting the great food he made me, even though I told him how good it was), but now we are used to it and it does not drive any kind of wedge between us.

[futureguineamom]

Aw thats great. Yeah, my parents are very old-fashioned, strict and controlling.. I mean, I'm almost 19 and my birthday is coming up fast.. and I still have a 12:00 curfew. I can't say the words "shut up" or even have my boyfriends arm around me when we are watching a movie on tv . Anyway, that isn't for this forum. I figured it will be nearly impossible until I move out. When I told my boyfriend about it he started trying to talk me out of it, and as soon as he saw how that made me feel he told me he would support me 100% in anything I do. Then he asked for some recipe's so he can cook for me sometime. Although, when we were at the mall he almost started up again, saying that I would have to give up PIZZA. Hah, it made me laugh. Doesn't he know there is vegetarian pizza?? Oh well, he does now. I think he is just concerned about all of the things I would have to give up, and getting the right nutritional needs. What a sweetie

[Alicemcmallis]

What kind of doctor do you have futureguineamom? Are they fairly current or very old school? I first started becoming vegetarian when I was about 13, and had my last piece of meat when I was 15. My mom took me to my doctor to talk about it and after hearing from the doctor that it was a perfectly reasonable and healthy lifestyle choice, was very supportive of me. Well, not VERY supportive, but supportive enough that she would make the stuffing separate from the turkey at Thanksgiving and would buy me veggie things to eat like soy burgers.

My parents are very much meat and potatoes type people and probably still think that it's healthier to have meat every day, but hearing about the benefits from a qualified, objective party (the doctor) probably made things much easier on me at home.

Also, they have recently told me that they didn't make a big deal out of it because they thought it was just a phase and I would "get over it" in a few years. Ha ha! 15 years later and I'm still in that "phase".

You can most definitely get all your nutritional needs met on a vegetarian diet as long as you eat a well balanced diet, like everyone should regardless of whether or not they eat meat. I was anemic when I was 12 and still eating meat. I was also anemic at another point in my life but for reasons not to do with my vegetarianism. I have been vegan for up to a year and a half with no medical issues. Actually, it was when I stopped being vegan and started eating a ton of cheese that my once fabulous cholesterol levels went up.

Oh and Life brand products from Shopper's Drug Mart aren't tested on animals, so it's now pretty easy for us Ontarians to get somewhat animal friendly products. Just a tip!

[Alicemcmallis]

Oh, I just realized I didn't answer any of your first questions!

I don't take nutritional supplements but I have all my levels checked at my yearly physical to make sure everything is okay, which it has been for ages now.

When going to another's house for dinner, if they don't already know I'm vegetarian (which would be unusual), I will mention that I'm a vegetarian and ask what side dishes they'll be serving. If it seems like there won't be enough for me to be satisfied on, I will offer to bring a large dish of something vegetarian (like a quiche as someone else mentioned, very tasty!) for everyone to have. That should go over well.

And the tofu issue. Dude, I once tried to eat a slice of raw tofu as you would eat a slice of cheese. I had no idea. It was horrible. *shudder* Now I know better. I have made a fabulous tofu quiche, a tofu "cheesecake", and regularly make a tofu cannelloni that hard core meat and cheese eaters love. Seriously. My ex fed it to his parents ( who eat meat with every single male as the main dish) and they didn't know it was tofu and thought it was delish.

It just takes practise to prepare it properly. I also go for prepared soy things, like the Yves products. They are now making chicken and beef strips that I hear are fabulous. Fake ground beef is amazing to substitute in traditional recipes like spaghetti sauce and lasagna. I know a woman who is married to a dairy farmer/hunter and she regularly cooks with this stuff simply because it's better for them.

[futureguineamom]

Hey, thanks for the reply! No, our doctor is an older doctor. And as for phases, as soon as my parents thought I was getting into a "phase" they'd "kick it in the butt" so to speak. They would do everything in their power to drive that phase away, before I could even go through it! So, I wasn't really able to ever have phases or be in a "phase."

I don't know, the look of tofu just makes me shudder. I was talking to my mom and she said that apparently Mc Donalds burgers are soy burgers.. and I don't think they tasted that bad (I know, Mc D's - gross)

[Alicemcmallis]

Unfortunately Mcdonalds burgers do contain meat, although I have had SO many people tell me that I should eat there because they're not real meat.

They have a really great veggie burger at Harvey's though, and I really like the one at Burger King too.

It's too bad about your parents being so restrictive and oppressive. It will be much easier when you move out on your own. Maybe they're worried about you being ostracized or made fun of? My parents had that concern too. But back then they didn't even have soy milk in the grocery store so they were more justified in thinking that. Nowadays being a vegetarian is so much more "normal".

Do you live in a fairly small community? A farming community maybe? I can see where it would much more unaccepted in that type of area. You would be seen as a "crazy rebel"!!

[futureguineamom]

no I'm not in a farming community, but in a small city. I know that is one of her concerns, she told me "you know, many people really look down on vegetarians" which I do know, and am ready to deal with it.