RE: Closing of thread "Can't find grids anywhere" in Cage Chat

[morganlh85]

Couldn't you have just closed the thread and left it at that? Removed the girls avatar or told her to do so and move on? Ban her from the forum? Was it really necessary to have the last word and have it be insulting and immature? I can only hope that I will never be treated that way here just because I make a mistake or break a rule. Honestly I never even noticed the girl's avatar! Either way, I would have expected a moderator to have taken the high road and be mature and resolve the problem, not sink to her level and resolve to petty name calling and mockery.

If you want the forum to remain professional, respectful, and free of childish activity, perhaps you should consider remaining professional and respectful yourself. I am quite shocked and disappointed that that sort of behavior would be allowed of ANYONE, much less a moderator. I'll be spending more time at cavy forums where the people in charge would never mock or insult their members, regardless of the infraction. There are much more civilized ways of handling a dispute.

Sincerely,
Morganlh85

[daftscotslass]

Did you even read the thread on the other section of the board where the poster you are talking about personally insulted a moderator?

http://cavycages.com/forum/showthread.php?t=18514

If you think that prettybow's behaviour on that thread in response to a perfectly valid question was acceptable, then perhaps this forum is not the place for you.

[morganlh85]

No I didn't read the thread. If the thread was innappropriate it should have just been deleted. I never said prettybow's behavior was appropriate, of course it isn't. But the moderators should have a much higher standard of handling such situations when they arise, and not by mocking someone or making petty comments. This is the only board that I visit in any category where a dispute would be handled this way. Generally the offending user is handled privately (that's what private messages are for) their posts are censored or removed, or they are banned from the forum. There is no need to air one's dirty laundry in a public forum and unless someone is murdering cavies in their home there was no need for that childish behavior. Two wrongs don't make a right.

[Jennicat]

You know, the moderators are people too. They do a relatively thankless job for free, that takes up a lot of time, and probably causes a lot of headaches. When some newbie bratling starts mouthing off at them, I'm surprised they don't get more irate about it.

The girl was PMed nicely about changing her icon, she exploded. I'd be a little irked about it too. If you don't get nasty with the mods, they generally don't get nasty with you. Two wrongs don't make a right, but moderators are not saints or angels. They're people. Handling these problems in public makes an example, and is transparent. People can see that this type of behavior is not tolerated, and know what is going on in the community.

[daftscotslass]

Completely agree Jenni. Couldn't have said it better myself.

[morganlh85]

Jennicat, I suppose you are right, the moderators do react like the rest of us would. And while it does scare off other potential offenders I think at the same time it can make the forum appear unfriendly and unwelcoming, and I wouldn't want good users to be scared off by that for fear of doing something wrong and being chewed out. I've been to other forums where the slightest wrongdoing results in maligning from the entire forum and they aren't friendly places to be; the slightest differing opinion is shot down with anger. I don't want this place to look like one of those, and that was my first thought when that moderator's reply showed up in my email.

[Percy's Mom]

Originally Posted by morganlh85

I wouldn't want good users to be scared off by that for fear of doing something wrong and being chewed out.

It wouldn't scare off good users. The good users understand what rules are, what this forum stands for, what kind of attitude is acceptable, and still manages to have a good time and enjoy what the forum has to offer. Even after being polite and giving her the warnings and messages in private messages, prettybow still could not manage to understand all of that.

[VoodooJoint]

PrettyBow WAY overreacted to a pm and a totally harmless question about hamsters smelling (or not smelling).

She was extremely rude to a moderator, undermined our rules about posting properly, cursed on the forum, flounced several times and couldn't seem to help but keep speaking about her breasts.

If someone is going to act like that on the public boards in an attempt to solicit sympathy or attention, when it could have been handled privately, then they deserve to be called out and chastised publically for it.

The post was left public to make an example of her to other members. If in case anyone missed the point, that is how you don't act. People that act like fools will be treated like fools. If they choose to do so publically then they cannot complain if they are treated like a fool where everyone can see.

[Ly&Pigs]

I suppose you are right, the moderators do react like the rest of us would.

Yep, we are human first and foremost. We have feelings too. How would you react in some of these situations? It's not easy being an admin/moderator sometimes. I have been called many nasty names (including the latest yesterday).

If you want the forum to remain professional, respectful, and free of childish activity, perhaps you should consider remaining professional and respectful yourself.

The vast majority of the time, we mods are like this but one cannot expect us to not be human either. I tend to treat people the way they treat me, moderator or not.

[Susan9608]

As the moderator in question here, I just have to say that I see nothing "mocking", "immature", and/or "disrespectful" in telling an individual that displaying half her breasts on a guinea pig forum is inappropriate. Just becaue *you* did not notice her avatar does not mean that no one else did; on the contrary - people actually complained at it.

The individual in question was given the opportunity to handle the situation like an adult. She choose not to do that. Instead, she chose to flounce on not one, but 2 different threads. She chose to act like a child and pick up her toys and go home because she didn't like being asked to follow the rules. Too bad for her. If you act like a child, you get treated like one.

I'll be spending more time at cavy forums where the people in charge would never mock or insult their members, regardless of the infraction.

This is awfully close to flouncing. If you feel that strongly about it, and don't want to stay here, then leave. Pretty simple.